Welcome to Linda's Date List Blog!
Hello Readers, Linda Here. Today I am inspired to talk about my personal story of survival. In my almost 50 years of life and experiences on this planet earth I have been through my share of personal heartache, abuse, robbed of my life savings by my X, humiliation, cheated on, lied to, financially struggling, threat of my life being taken from me and much more. This is what inspired me to start Lindasdatelist.com.
In the last 13 years, since 2002, the above mentioned has happened to me personally. I have made some very bad choices, trusted too much and given my heart away for one man. It has been 4 years now since my separation/divorce and I just want to encourage my readers/followers that even though life deals you some bad hands and doesn't always go as planned, you can recover!
Four years ago when I left my X, I was left pretty much penniless. I had enough money to get into an apartment, with very little money coming in. When I was married, I did not work. I was going through a person struggle of sexual assault and sexual harassment at my previous employer that left me very depressed and weak both physically and mentally. Even though I wasn't working and married, I managed to bring in more money per month than my husband due to the various lawsuits. My X was in total control of the finances and I trusted him completely which turned out to be a huge mistake. Ladies, always pay attention to your joint finances with your husband. Don't trust anyone and always make sure to keep an eye on where the money is going. My good friend Sue always told me that but I didn't listen. Big Mistake.
Anyhow, after being robbed of my money, I was in my apartment alone. Every day contemplating suicide as I just did not know how I was going to make it through my life without my X and I did not want to start my life over again.
Every day I would talk to my BFF of over 40 years now and she would talk me out of taking all the pills that I had at my disposal. It was a struggle but with her help and God's grace, I didn't do it. There were many days I laid in bed for days without even getting up and leaving the house. My daughter was a huge help and my mother too along with my close friends.
After about 5 months of barely skimming by financially, I managed to find a pretty decent job. From there I have been working every since and every job earning more and more money which has helped my self respect and self confidence.
I didn't want to ask for a divorce but my X was a cheater, liar, manipulator, control freak and turns out a thief. To this day he has my money and I see him on the same Online Dating sites that I am on. I can see he is desperately trying to find someone and his bio is full of desperation and lies. Is it hard to read? YES. I feel so sorry for the women he is conning and I only hope they find my website and read all about the kind of person he is. But, I cannot sit and worry about the women. I have to pay attention to me and my needs and wants now with my new life.
For all of the ladies who have been through an impossible divorce and made it through even stronger, I applaud you.
Since my separation and with God's help, I started my website, published 2 books, have been interviewed for various companies and magazines, have a great career making more money than I ever had, live on the beach with a beautiful ocean view, drive a luxury car with no financial debt. I have reconnected with old friends, restarted family relationships and gained a lot of new friends. My life is full.
I am finally at peace with myself, the things I have done, own my mistakes and I am very proud of the person I am today. Although this did not come easy, with hard work, God's love and grace, I have done it. I have come a very long way than where I was 4 years ago.
I don't expect my life to be easy and care free as I am no fool. Anything can happen but by going through what I have been through, I am strong enough physically, spiritually and emotionally to make it through anything. It's a day by day condition. It's called persevering and learning from my mistakes and always trying to be a better person every day.
I can honestly say I am happy, blessed and thankful every day when I wake up to be able to put on nice clothes, get in my luxury car and drive to the job that I love very much. Every day is a good day and even if things don't go my way, I trust and have faith in God to lead me where he wants me to go. You see, I don't deserve all that I have but God blesses me and by his grace, I make it through.
For anyone going through a rough time whether it be divorce, break up, family problems, financial difficulties or anything else, remember that time heals and looking back where you were is not the way to persevere. Always look ahead. Don't look back because you are not going that way. Put one foot in front of the other and carry on however you have to. Life is too short and you must make the best of it.
Even though I haven't had a boyfriend or any meaningful relationships since my divorce, I am happy and when you are happy and content with yourself and your life, you will attract the right person at the right time. Be patient, keep your family and friends close and keep moving forward. Write that book, eat healthy, exercise and gain perspective. If I never left my cheating husband, I would be as miserable today as I was during my marriage. I have no regrets about leaving him. It was the best thing I ever did for ME!....
I would love to hear your stories, so please contact me at Linda@Lindasdatelist.com.
For the year 2016, a lot of exciting things are going to happen here on Lindasdatelist.com. Podcasts, Online Dating Courses and new books on the way! It's going to be a great year!
I love you all and thank you for reading my posts and my goal is to share my experiences to try and help other people.
Look me up (Linda Jenkins) on Amazon and Kindle for my 2 books. "The Top 10 Things People Lie About on Online Dating Sites and Why" What every Online Dater needs to know and 'Nowhere to Hide" My true story of Sexual Assault and Sexual Harassment.