My Story – Inspiration
Hello readers and thank you for visiting my site. My inspiration for this site is to help other online daters and people in relationships to find love, identify people who are deceiving you or better ways to help you in your online pursuits or in your relationships.
Today I would like to finally disclose the story of why I created this web site.
I met my X-husband on Match.com in 2002. I picked him out right away. He looked like my perfect match so I cannot remember if he contacted me or I contacted him first but it really doesn't matter.
We met for the first time and I was definitely smitten. He was very handsome and funny and intelligent. Although, I thought he was too skinny but a lot of bachelors are. He liked me too and he planned a second date a drink and a movie. We had a lot of fun.Then he planned a third date and asked me to be exclusive and I agreed. I'd like to admit that it really was love at first sight. He was an X NFL Football player and I was a huge Football fan myself.
As things progressed, we spent a great deal of time together. Then my job required that I start traveling every week so our time was cut so I would only see him on the weekends. What I found out later, he had his regular nasty girls coming by during the week when I was not there. I picked up on the signs and then I read some emails and it all made sense.
All of his girls were much older and fat. I didn't get it? I was the perfect girl, so pretty and sweet and worst of all very forgiving.. my biggest mistake was taking him back every time after he begged me to and that he would no do it anymore....So, not only did he lie, he never told me the truth about the other girls. Then at least I could have a choice in whether I wanted to keep seeing him under Ron's Rules.... but he continued to lie and see other women.
We dated for five years and then he bought me a beautiful engagement ring and we were married a few months later. I was so happy I could not even believe it, I thought OK, he has the cheating out of his system which was not the case. He kept one nasty older woman ugly older woman around Sheryl Smalley from Beverly Hills... You can look her up on Facebook... She's the one with long fake black hair that covers her face because she is so ugly and bi-sexual. She dresses like a teenager who is 63years old.
Finally I had enough and I asked him for a divorce in 2011. He agreed but swears he never wanted it and was waiting for me to change my mind.
The day he moved out, I logged into our Online Banking Accounts and saw that he embezzled over 95,000 into his personal business account that I was supposed to be on and after going to the bank that day they told me I was not on it... another lie he told me.
I confronted him that day about it and he said it was none of my business and that there was nothing I could do about it.. I was devastated, after all that was my personal money he stole from me. I had no idea how I was going to get that back so I got a lawyer right away and we started the divorce process. I moved out the next day and wrote a check for my deposit for my condo and that bounced because he also drained the account. I had to borrow money from my Mom until my tax return came in. embarrassing.
He basically left me penniless and he wouldn't even pay his alimony.... I had been out of work for 5 years so it was not easy to find a job right away but I did.
Then one day he calls me from our doctor on his way home and tells me he tried to kill himself the night before by slitting his forearms... I didn't believe him so he asked to meet me at Starbucks so I did and sure enough he did... He cut so deep into his arms but he didn't tell the doctor... So, I was so worried about him I started going to his place every day to help care for his horrendous wounds.. Then one day after he left for work, I was on his computer and found the suicide note. It was to his brother telling him to keep everything, it didn't sink in. But I found out later he gave his brother 80,000 to keep for him to ruin my life.
Then later I found an email to his mistress Sheryl Smalley asking her to have Bobby her X boyfriend to take me and my daughter out and he didn't care if he had to pay for it but it would be worth it. I showed my attorney right away and he told me to call the police right away and so I got a call from Long Beach Homicide Detectives. That's how serious they thought this was and it was. They brought me in for questioning and then told me they were doing a entire investigation and I was not to tell anyone until it's over. That was so hard, I couldn't sleep for a very long time and even put a chair in front of my front door.
You see the reason he wanted this was he didn't want me to get my money back and Sheryl wanted it to get me out her way (she thought). She told Bobby the supposed hit man Ron will never leave Linda and so this is the only way to get rid of her.
After the investigation it went to the DA's office and they said not enough evidence so I moved again shortly after that.
I was still in fear for my life and felt betrayed so I started this web site to try to help other people by telling my story. In fact, I told many stories about finding him cheating and all the drama.
The last 4 months of his life we started talking on the phone... Every time we would talk he would cry and I would cry... We both agreed we should have never divorced and met a couple times in person. The first time I met him he was so skinny again. First thing I told him was he was too skinny and he needs to take better care of himself and the most amazing thing happened too when I saw him. Immediately, I forgave him and all of the anger and bitterness went away... We met at a bar and we were both crying in public at the bar but we didn't care... You see, I think the guilt finally got to him of what he tried to do and when I told him I forgave him he couldn't believe it. He told me he still loved me and always did. I told him the same thing, it was a nice, positive and futuristic reunion. At that point, I knew we would get back together and be married again, no question in my mond or his. I was so happy as I realized I never stopped loving him and he felt the same, just made some bad mistakes. This just goes to show that you can fogive someone if you really love them no matter what amazingly enough.
The next day he came over to my place and we talked some more and again he told me he loved me. I didn't want him to leave.
Then we kept in touch over the phone and sometimes when I talked to him he didn't sound good at all. Our doctor said he had TBI the Brain Injury from too many concussions. Some days he sounded normal and some days he didn't. I seriously thought about packing a bag and moving in with him to help care for him, I was so worried but I didn't because I knew my family would go crazy so I didn't. In hindsight I wish I would have... I feel so guilty for not doing that and worrying more about what my family would think... Advice, never worry about what other people think, go with your gut...
So, we were still talking on the phone and crying and laughing about all of our good times and things we could do better. We were on the verge of reconciling...
Then on Monday April 18, 2016 I was at work and got a call from his brother telling me that Ron hung himself... I screamed and could not believe what I heard... I was inconsolable... I left work right away and called my brother who tried to calm me down. Then I called my daughter who called my Mom who was there when I got home... I also called my dear friend Jacquie who had lost her son the same way. She was there for me and I will never forget that. I somehow made it up to my condo and when I walked in my mom was there. I cried and cried for hours....That pain I will never forget EVER. It's a different pain then losing a parent or friend. This was the love of my life.... I still have that pain in my gut and my heart today.
I had to take time off work to get therapy.
A week after he passed, I got a call from Bobby who wanted to know what was going on between Ron, Sheryl and myself... I was scared to death that he was calling me until I realized he had no idea that Ron hung himself.. HE was just mad at Sheryl for treating him so badly after sending her money for flowers for a funeral... Well, guess who's funeral that was for?
He told me he told Ron and Sheryl the week before he was going to the police with all of the evidence. You see, he was a private investigator for 31 years and when they asked him to do this he said no way. He didn't want to get involved but secretly recording every conversation with Ron and Sheryl and kept all of the emails and texts. He didn't turn them in earlier during the investigation because he and Sheryl had been boyfriend and girlfriend for several years and she cried to him not to turn her in so he didn't.
But now the week before he threatened both of them he was turning the evidence. You see, I thought he was a bad guy all these years and turns out he saved my life. Bobby and I started talking daily so he gave me all the scary details of the whole thing. The timing of Ron's death was impeccable because Bobby left 2 voicemail's to Ron and a couple days before he hung himself. You see there was no way he wanted anyone to find out what he did and he surely wasn't going to jail. His TBI also played a HUGE part in his suicide too. He was suffering badly...
Now the DA's office has all the evidence so after all the court proceedings and stuff she is finally going to prison for conspiracy to commit murder and that carries a life sentence. I cannot wait. She needs to pay for what she did.
Ron paid with his life and honestly, I would do anything to have him back and I know that's impossible, but I only hope God showed him mercy in his last moments of life...
Meanwhile, Ron's family invited her to Washington to the burial of Ron and that just kills me. They only know what Ron told them and they believed him. They have no idea about all of this and I do not want to cause them any stress as they are still mourning like myself.
So, that's what happened and I writing a new book from start from finish... What I wrote in this blog does not include everything that needs to be told..
Ron Jenkins RIP.. I'll always love you and forgive you... and I still miss you and think about you every day, the love of my life...
Contact me at Linda@LindasDatelist.com
XOXO, Linda
I myself have been an Online Dater since 2002 off and on, found the love of my life on Match.com and sadly lost him.
I am still pursuing love online but I have learned a lot of lessons and am here to blog and write about them in order to help other people.
Please be careful there are millions of people out there on dating sites and we need to inform one another about our experiences good or bad.
Thank you and please send me feedback on the use of this site in your dating world.
Good luck!
Linda [Contact me]