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Contact me Linda@Lindasdatelist.com
XOXO,
Linda
Hello Readers, please like my brand new Facebook Page! https://www.facebook.com/LindaDateCoach/
Contact me Linda@Lindasdatelist.com
XOXO,
Linda
Hello Readers, Linda here. Today I want to talk about Facebook and Dating. Ok, so essentially, Facebook has turned into a dating/hook-up/ site unintentionally.
I accepted a friend request from a super-hot looking young man from Long Island. He then sent me a message on messenger after I commented on one of his posts. He wanted my phone number so we could talk. I thought to myself, ‘SELF’, go ahead and see what this young hot man has to say after all this does happen to me a lot where I have the younger men asking me out. ANYHOO, I gave him my digits and to my surprise I was listening to a young gigolo. For those of you who do not know what the definition of a Gigolo is – GIGOLO “a young man paid or financially supported by an older woman to be her escort or lover”.
synonyms: |
playboy, escort, male escort, paid escort; |
He proceeded to tell me how attractive I was to him and how I didn’t look my age, blah, blah, blah… Then he asked what I did for a living. After I told him, he really amped up his game. He told me how he always wanted to come to California and how much he loved the ocean. Then he got down and dirty and started asking questions about how I like to have sex (very explicitly). I barely did any talking as he would not let me get much of a chance to talk.
When I did get to talk I kept calling him “young” and that really upset him because he said he may be young but he is not immature and took offense to my calling him young. Almost to the point of anger so bad that if he was in front of me I am not sure what if he would resort to violence. So, I just let him go on and calm down, after all I had to get this story out especially because he said he met another woman on Facebook that lives in Miami and when he goes to Miami to DJ, he meets up with her there, spends the night, has sex and leaves in the morning. He described it like you were telling someone how to make coffee… LMAO…. Obviously a professional.
Ladies, if a man you are sleeping with describes you like he’s making coffee, like no big deal, like breathing, that is not ROMANTIC. You want a man to go on and on about how wonderful and beautiful you are and how much he loves you etc. Now that I am writing this, I am coming to the conclusion that this is all part of his game, after all if he described the older lady in Miami as being beautiful and sexy etc. that could blow it for his next potential victim but a lot of women won’t catch this like I just did…. This guy is good…. A woman that would fall for a guy like this would feel that was in her favor because after all, you are much more desirable then how he described her and he will fall madly in love with you and move in and you will have a hot looking guy at your disposal. SIGH – Don’t be one of those women please! Moving on…
Then he proceeded to tell me to look at my calendar in the next couple of weeks to see when I had a weekend open. I played along and picked a date. He then proceeded to tell me that since he was my guest, he would expect me to pay for all of his expenses and since it’s such a long flight, (he was checking flights as I was talking to him), he would have to fly FIRST CLASS. I would be responsible to pay for all food and entertainment and in return I would have the time of my life. OH and he said if I came out to Long Island, he would return the favor and pay for me. ROFLOL
I then politely told him I would have to check with my business partners on the dates and get right back to him. He said “today right”? “You’ll get back to me today”? I said sure honey, I’ll get right back to you today.
Well, we know that never happened. After the call I blocked him from my phone but kept him as a FB friend and I suppose after a few days, he realized no phone call cometh!
Then he proceeds to post on Facebook little digs and I know they are for me but I am amused that he really thought I was going to fall for that. Even if he was a millionaire and planned a trip and paid for it himself, I am not at all interested. I am not attracted to men that young… Young man, Young man… LOL
This was my first experience with a gigolo in my life. I am writing about it because it is such an ancient term but obviously very alive today. I am wondering if he spends all his time on Facebook scamming women. Or, maybe I would have been cat fished? Who knows, but ladies and gentlemen, do not be fooled by what I just wrote. This could happen to you. I have had many women and men write to me and tell me horror stories of long distance loves where they fly out to the guy/girl, pay for hotel rooms and the guy/girl doesn’t pay a dime. This can be very dangerous not only for you mentally but in some cases physically as well. Just DON”T DO IT! No matter how much in love you think you are….
It takes time to get to know someone and I am not a huge fan of long distance relationships anyway, so my advice would be to try and avoid them altogether.
Many of you might think ‘why does Linda accept such Facebook requests’? Linda will accept a Facebook request if Linda feels like there is a story around the person. This guy was incredibly handsome and I just knew there was a reason why he would send me a request and I was right. Go with your GUT instinct. I wouldn’t suggest the average person to do what I did. The only reason I did is because I am a writer and I want to help people avoid bad situations. This is ME and this is what I do and I do it in a safe manner.
Just another situation to be aware of and keep your guard up for. Gigolo’s do still exist and just be very careful for you could lose your money, your life or your self-respect after all is said and done. It is just not worth it.
I would love to hear your feedback on this subject!
Contact me at Linda@Lindasdatelist.com
Don’t forget to check out my book “The Top 10 Things People Lie About on Online Dating Sites and Why” What Every Online Dater Needs to Know
https://www.amazon.com/Things-People-About-Online-Dating/dp/1502780372
XOXO,
Hello Readers, Linda here. Today I want to talk about a ‘Couch Date’. What exactly is a ‘Couch Date’? Well it’s a date a guy makes that is essentially come on over and watch a movie and I’ll cook you dinner or we’ll eat out later (take-out)…. Mind you, LADIES, DO NOT do this on the FIRST DATE!
Make the guy court you for a few dates before you accept a Couch Date. If you accept a Couch Date on the first date, you are selling yourself short. In fact, never go to a guy’s home on the first date because you are essentially giving him no room to hunt you down…. Men are Hunters by nature…
Back to the Couch Date… So, you have had a few great dates and it’s time to get casual which is totally fine especially if both of you are working professionals and short on time… After all, you don’t need to go out every night!
What does a lady wear to a Couch Date? I guarantee you when you show up to his place for the Couch Date, he will be wearing shorts, flip flops and a tee-shirt…. Actually, that is as sexy to us as women. We really like guys when they wear this type of apparel for the Couch Date… It’s super cute BUT don’t get carried away and think you can dress the same for the very first Couch Date! Ladies ‘HOLD YOUR LIPSTICK’!
For your very first Couch Date you should still be super cute… I suggest a cute pair of jeans, wedges or sexy shoes and an off the shoulder cute blouse…. Lipstick, full make-up and perfume of course…. If he says ‘Why did you get so dressed up just to watch a movie’? You let him know that this is your casual. Trust me, no guy is going to kick you out the door for looking casual/sexy….. It’s when you show up in pajama pants and slippers he will think twice on the first Couch Date….
This shows him that you respect yourself enough to pretty up for yourself and him and think about this: what if the Couch Date goes really bad? If so, you can politely leave and still go out with your girlfriends… AKA – Plan B…. Always have a Plan B and an Exit Strategy…..
If the first Couch Date goes well and all he wants to do is Couch Dates and stop taking you out, then we have a problem… Couch Dates are reserved for those weeks where you just want to relax….. If he doesn’t want to do anything but Couch Dates from then on, you must stop accepting his Couch Dates until he makes a real date…. And if he doesn’t then you have turned from dream girl to doormat… and a lady of your stature won’t put up with that…..
Ok, second Couch Date…. It is acceptable to wear something a little more casual like a sundress and cute flip flops, I’m not talking ugly worn out flip flops…. Nice in good shape flip flops and a sundress that is in good shape not with bleach stains or holes….
When you use the restroom at his home, pay attention to see if the toilet seat is up or down… The toilet seat should always be DOWN. This is just respectful… If he leaves the toilet seat up then well, he is short on manners after all, he knew you were coming over so the restroom should be clean and the toilet seat down with TOILET PAPER in the holder…. If the TOILET PAPER is laying on the floor or even worse you have to search for it then that is a RED FLAG… He should respect you enough to think of these things…
Beverages... he should have water, wine or cocktails for you there. Don’t offer to bring something on the first Couch Date…. Later on, if things go well, you can certainly BYOW (Bring your own wine)…. He should be thinking of all these things before you come over… In fact a really great Couch Dater will ask you what you would like to drink while you watch the movie….
Let’s talk about the choice in movies on the Couch Date… it should be a chick flick one night and a wam bam shoot-em up movie the next. And, if it is something you have already seen, don’t settle, and just suggest a movie that you both have not seen yet…. It’s perfectly OK to voice your opinion after all men are pleasers and you should indulge him in letting him please you. Same thing goes for the choice in food... If it’s something you do not want, tell him… Trust me, a decent guy will appreciate a lady who knows what she wants and voices her opinion…..
I would love to hear your feedback on Couch Dating so please contact me at Linda@Lindasdatelist.com
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XOXO, Linda
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XOXO, Linda
Hello Readers, Linda here. Today I want to talk about Facebook. Years ago when Facebook first started, it was fun and a great way to get in touch with old family members and schoolmates etc. It has brought a lot of people together that have lost touch over the years. Myself personally, I LOVE Facebook because it keeps me informed about family members that I love and care about and friends.
However; in the last year or so I have noticed that it is more like a dating site these days. I accept a lot of friend requests if we have mutual friends and after I look at their account, I decide whether to accept them or not. This has posed a problem because I also have Facebook Messenger where I get many friends of friends that hit me up for dates all the time. It’s like I accept their invite and 60 seconds later BOOM, I get a notification on messenger flirting with me. UGH!
This is annoying because in my case I am a lady and I get many guys that I am not the least bit attracted to hitting on me… Just because I accepted your request, does not mean I want to be your girlfriend or meet for coffee or whatever. I, like many of you have a busy life and do not always have time to meet all of my friends on Facebook especially if they are hitting on me….
Then comes the question, do I unfriend them or block them? Yes, I have done that a lot but what about if you have mutual friends that you talk to or see frequently? This puts me in an awkward position.
My profile may say I am single but that doesn’t mean I am not dating someone at the time. I would never change my status unless it was a very serious relationship and that takes time. So, let’s make one thing clear, just because it says single on my status, does not mean I am available. I may be dating someone really special and am off the market so to speak.
I am sure this works both ways and I am sure this happens to the guys as well and I feel sorry for them( a little) because let’s face it they are guys and they love to feed their ego. (Sorry, not sorry). I just know men too well. But I am sure there are exceptions to this too.
Another thing that blows me away is the “People You May Know” section on Facebook. These are the people that are looking at your profile. Most of the guys looking at mine are married or in a relationship yet they are constantly looking. I am tired of seeing the same old faces on there not to mention then I get their wives or girlfriends looking too. Hey, I am NOT DOWN for a Love Triangle situation whatsoever!
Why are you looking? Ok, I may be pretty but I am not posting risqué pictures or anything like that at all so the fact is that they will look for a week or two and then the request comes in. If I accept, then the messenger comes…. It’s a vicious cycle….
Something not everyone knows is Facebook does indeed have a dating site called Facebook Dating. In fact there are at least 8 that I just did a search for that came up on Facebook. So, why doesn’t Facebook advertise this? Not really sure but why not go on there to look for a date?
Another thing, many times I have gone a date (one date) and it didn’t work out for various reasons and the next thing I know that person shows up in the “People You May Know” section… How does that happen? STALKERS….. This does not make me happy….
Remember there are many Online Dating sites you can go on to look for a date like Plenty of Fish, Tinder, and Match.com etc. so why not go there? Truth is most of the single people on Facebook are on a dating site or two.
Then you have the friends that you did meet that it didn’t work out that are relentless in asking you out again. No matter what I tell them they just do not give up. Guys need a lot of help in this situation trust me. Yes, I am a really nice person and I like all my Facebook Friends but you have to draw the line somewhere.
Please let’s all keep this in mind before you do any of the above listed on Facebook. It’s perfectly fine to be friends, if you go to a mutual event and run into someone on your list and like that person that is perfectly OK too. By all means, pursue that if there is mutual interest. I am in no way saying you can’t meet the love of your life on Facebook because it does happen but go about it in a respectful way.
Don’t be a Facebook STALKER!
I would love to hear your comments, opinions and suggestions on this topic!
Please contact me at Linda@Lindasdatelist.com
XOXO, Linda
Hello Readers, Linda here. Today I want to talk about a real problem in the Online Dating world today and that is being on your phone when you are on a date. Some examples are the following: not putting your phone on silent, not turning it off, texting constantly, checking your Facebook and Instagram Accounts and the worst, checking your messages from your Online Dating Site. (Yes, this really happens)
This is a hot topic right now in the Dating World because everyone has a smartphone and let’s face it, we are all addicted to our phones we even take them when we go to the bathroom.
Here is one example that I speak about because it happened to me. I was dating a guy for a couple of months when he asked me to go on a mini vacation to the river. I went and to my surprise, he was on his phone texting non-stop even while he was driving home. I cannot tell you how infuriated I was. It was so rude and let’s say he didn’t score any points at all for that. Many things were running through my mind like who is he texting, does he have side girls that he lied to and said he was doing something else, is he making a date with someone else? This was not a good look and later on I told him about it and how rude it was. My mistake was not telling him on the way home. Ladies, you have every right to make noise and complain about this if it happens to you.
Consider this, you are dating someone and have a nice date planned and the candles are lit, the music is on, wine poured and the setting is just right when SHE grabs her phone and starts going through her Facebook account! What? I was told that the guy stayed with her for two hours and out of the two hours, she was on her phone one hour and forty five minutes! This woman clearly has some issues and my friend got up and left understandably. That was so rude.
Ladies and Gentlemen, if you are on a date, put your phone away. It is just a bad look. Your date will think you are waiting for another guy or girl to text you and that is a HUGE turn-off and makes a really bad impression. I was guilty of this as well when I first started dating someone recently and he pointed it out and I am so happy he did because he was 100% right. Although my reason was that I was working and answering emails. I am a workaholic and not sure when to turn it off, something I am working on now.
My question is this, why would you even ask or accept a date when you are on your phone the entire time? You may as well be at home posting on Facebook all night about how lonely you are and how single you are etc. aka poor me…..
If you are interested in a guy or girl then LISTEN to what they have to say on the date. That is why we DATE so we can see whether this is a suitable person to be around and how will you even know if you’re on your phone the entire time? You would be very lucky if the person even wants to see you again honestly.
Exceptions to the rule? Yes, if you left your kids with a sitter and want to check in, politely excuse yourself from the table and make the call. No longer than five minutes period.
Another exception would be if you have an elderly parent/parents and you want to check on them, follow the same steps above.
If your kids are adults and you are an empty nester, no excuses…..put your phone away.
If this happens to you while you are on the date, I think you definitely should call the person out immediately. Let them know that your time is as valuable as theirs and if they would like to meet another time because they are busy, then you can always get in your car and leave.
This will show them that you value yourself and respect yourself enough to stand up for yourself and you will simply not put up with it! If they respect you, they will put it away and if they get angry well then that is a HUGE RED FLAG so then you have my permission to get up and leave.
If they are that interested in texting, looking at Facebook or Instagram, they have all night after you leave, then they can sit there alone at the bar and post all night….
I would love to hear your stories on this topic, comments or questions. Contact me at Linda@Lindasdatelist.com
XOXO, Linda
Hello Readers, Linda here. Today I would like to tell you what I have discovered about Pro-Athletes and Former Pro-Athletes. I have gained a lot of information lately on this very subject that I know every woman needs to hear about.
Recently, I have received a few emails regarding a certain Former Pro Athlete. He lives in the LA/OC area and has played for various baseball teams. He is now retired.
I have discovered that this man who is currently in his 40s, is one of the biggest PLAYERS and Womanizers that I have heard about in a long time. Every woman that I have spoken to or emailed back and forth with thinks that she is the only one. These poor women are so wrong. To date, I have spoken to or emailed at least 3 women – and I am sure the list goes on. These women are too trusting and understanding of this man’s behavior and lies. One woman I spoke with believes she is his only girlfriend because he has given her a drawer for her overnight women’s things. This small gesture makes her feel like she’s the only one. NOT TRUE! I’m sure he quickly removes her things from sight as soon as she leaves.
The other women who frequent his place probably know nothing about each other because he’s gotten so good at hiding his lies. One “girlfriend” told me that she spends the night there often, however he won’t let her hang clothes in his closet. HMMMMMMM. Isn’t that interesting? If these ladies were the only ones, why wouldn’t he allow her to hang clothes up in his closet? Makes you think right? The only possible reason is that he never knows who will be coming over the next night and another “girlfriend” may get upset seeing women’s clothes in his closet. Could he even be stupid enough to give more than one girl the key to his house?
This man also frequents New York for “business”, but we know it’s never just about business. I learned about at least one other “girlfriend” who lives there. So, his NY visit are really again just about getting laid (and of course getting more attention). Guys like this are so insecure that they really just want attention from anyone. This poor NY girl probably thinks she is the one (just like the LA/OC girls think) and that he is truly invested in her… Think again.
He rarely travels with any of the girls because wherever he goes he has a different girl in every state and even in London. He told one of the girls he was going to London to get measured for a suit there…. Hmmmmmm…. Alone? Isn’t that interesting? I have not found out who the girl or girls are there yet but I am sure they will come out as these women are getting smarter.
Recently, he went to New York wearing a jacket that one of his girls gave to him while he was visiting the NY Girl… how sad is that?
Meanwhile, even more recently he flew the NY Girl out for her birthday for almost a week and she secretly filmed his house with his back was turned while he was cooking her birthday dinner (so you could see him in the background). Who does that?? I’ll tell you who does that – a girl who thinks this guy is her boyfriend… Remember this is not the women’s fault but HIS and HIS ALONE.
I have to say I have lived that life and married an X NFL Player who did the same things to me. I have survived and lived to tell about it. You see, after my X refused to give up his mistress, I left him. I had no choice and it was the last thing I wanted to do but I had to do it for my own sanity.
Sadly, after our separation, he and his mistress tried to hire someone to kill me. Luckily I found out about it and reported it to the police and homicide detectives. The whole experience was a nightmare that no one should have to live through. Sadly, due to mental instability, my X husband took his own life last year, April 15th 2016. In addition to his mental sickness, he had extreme guilt and a scarred reputation. I am still very upset and sad about all that took place. I still loved this man and was ready to forgive him. We got very close to reconciling before he took his life. We spent significant time working on rebuilding our relationship and even made peace with the past – we were ready to move forward with our second marriage. You may think I am crazy but this man was the LOVE of my life and I was devastated to say the least, as it was so unexpected.
Hence the reason I write my blogs, give advice and counseling to ladies and men like myself.
Let’s get back to Mr. X Athlete Womanizer…
I am in an awkward position because I care about these women and want to tell them that the man they’re spending time with probably does care about them, but that he just makes BAD decisions… I do not want to see them go through what I did. Pro-Athletes and former Pro-Athletes hold themselves to this great reputation and can be so EGOTISTICAL. They’re either sponsored and afraid of losing endorsements or worried about scarring their reputation, that they live double and even triple lives. And if someone manages to shake that up with threats of exposure, they will do just about anything to save face. You may think this is a crazy blog and what I am saying cannot really happen, then you my friend are truly delusional. These guys will do anything and think they are above the law (case in point OJ Simpson) they actually think they can get away with anything.
They are the most selfish, self-absorbed and self-serving people on the planet. My X who played for Dallas in the 80’s told me the protocol of what happens before and after games especially away games.
There is someone assigned to show these guys photos or even in person women who they can F*** after the games and the number of girls at one time is optional. Pretty scary huh? So, these guys get exposed to kinky, crazy sex which makes them more addicted so when they retire they do not want to give that up. It’s an addiction and even if they marry, they still cheat on their wives. Think about how many athletes cheat on their wives and are exposed but the wives hang in there because they get use to the life style. It’s a vicious cycle.
Here are my suggestions if you are dating or think you are an athletes GF below:
• Always check up on them.
o Get them use to staying in contact with you. If they go MIA, you know something is off.
o When they travel, get their itinerary (flight and hotel information). Tell them that you want to make sure they arrive safely.
• If they say they’re traveling with buddies or alone, BIG RED FLAG. Don’t buy it. These athletes need a girl every night and this only means that they are there visiting another woman or on a quest to hire an escort or two.
• Do a background check to see how many restraining orders they have against women or women have against them. They could be violent case in point Ray Rice and Adrian Peterson.
• When you get a chance, get on their computers and look at their emails and photos.
o See if there are any dick pics (that were never sent to you) or photos of other women.
• Always check their Social Media sites…IG, FB, and Twitter etc. A really smart thing to do is to create a ‘Google Alert’ with their name so if anything goes on anywhere where they are at, you can see the alert and photos etc. Remember they are celebrities and want to be noticed.
• If they are on Social Media and don’t post pictures of the two of you, this is another BIG RED FLAG. A man who cherishes you will show you off to the world!
What to do if you are one of these girls and thought you were the only one? My advice is to RUN as FAST AS YOU CAN. These guys do not change….. You will get hurt, depressed, lose self-confidence, psychologic issues, and trust issues for the rest of your lives finding it hard to trust anyone else and worst of all KILLED. And that my friend is NO JOKE.
Always remember you have your girlfriends and myself to help you through this. You can never trust an athlete retired or active so you need to do your due diligence to keep yourself safe. And remember, if he is not using protection while having sex with you, he is not using it with anyone else. Case in point (Magic Johnson) who contracted HIV.
Bottom line; protect your heart, your sanity, your life and your health. Don’t fall for these guys and their BS stories. They will tell you anything to get laid and it is sad but true.
If you know who I am speaking about, please contact me at Linda@Lindasdatelist.com
Any comments or concerns, contact me…..
One more very important thing, if you are one of these women, go immediately to your OBGYN and get tested for every VD you can be tested for… If you come up positive for anything, I will update this blog with the information for the other women. You can remain anonymous and you will only be helping the women involved or any women reading this….. Ladies, we need to stick together and I know the truth hurts but it is better to know than not to know… think about it…
My love to you all!
XOXO, Linda
Hello Readers, Linda here. Today I want to talk about 'Online Dating Etiquette for the Guys'. I've been an Online Dater on and off since 2002 and I want to point out a few things that the guys are just doing wrong.
First thing is this, educate yourself on how the ladies think. You must know your prey very well before you go on the hunt. You can do this by reading books, talking to friends that are female, reading my blogs or just from learning from your experiences. We all have had some experiences with the opposite sex that just didn't go well so you need to reflect back on those and realize what you did to screw it up and how you won't repeat that behavior, that thing you did, the thing you didn't do etc.
Once you do your research, you then can start practicing. What do I mean by practicing? Well, the good thing about online dating is there are millions of people out there and available to practice on. So you start messaging ladies and practice saying the right things and see how it goes.
Here are a few things that guys say to me that I totally get offended by and trust me I'm no prude but guys, you need to have some class!
1. Hey sexy - this is annoying and makes me think all you want to do is get laid. And that opening line is probably the same one you send to every girl so I'm not buying it. I ignore these guys that say that first thing. Obviously they don't know how to talk to a lady and the first impression is a lasting one so guys, stop using that line immediately.
2. Are you a sexual person? - seriously? This came up the other day. I mean the guy was doing pretty good at first and then he throws that line in. First off, why would you even ask that? I'm thinking ok, maybe he had a wife that didn't like sex so he is asking up front? Naw... Next thing I'm thinking is he is just looking to get laid. Then I think wow, he seemed like a decent guy at first so maybe he's a manipulator type and I don't want that either. Next is, it's just rude to ask that. Guys, newsflash, us ladies are looking for love and respect from a guy. That is so disrespectful to ask someone when you don't even know them. It's a total turn off and after a long lecture back to him, I blocked him I have no time for guys that don't know how to speak to a lady.
3. From a guy who said he was my age but clearly was not and admitted it ' do you like younger men'? - honestly I have a daughter his age but I was curious so I asked him, why do you like older women? His answer, I have mommy issues. I'm not kidding! So, I continue, why do you have mommy issues? He says well my mom walked in on me masturbating and it turned me on! Really? Now, I'm getting concerned. So, I tell him that's pretty weird and scary. He then tells me he doesn't understand how that weirds me out? I say, well what if you had a daughter and you walked in on her? What would you do? Ok, are you sitting down for this? He says to me, I would ask her if she needed any help! Ok, now I'm really freaked out and I told him soon I will see his face on the news as a child predator or rapist and in jail, they don't take kindly to people like you. You need serious help. Then I reported him to the site and hopefully they took the proper actions. Whew! Bad bad bad...
So, that was just a few and I could go on and on but let's talk about how to talk to a lady on a dating site the proper way shall we?
First, remember to do your homework. Read a book. In fact, read 'Masterdate by George Reagan'. I read this book and it's a great guide for the guys who are online dating. I highly recommend it. After you've done your homework and practiced with a few ladies, you see someone your are really interested in. So, now you are better prepared to speak like a gentleman to a lady. When I say lady, I'm talking about a nice girl who isn't flaunting her half naked body in her photos double fishing two cocktails in a bar setting surrounded by guys. I'm talking about a nice normal girl who has good pictures and doesn't have to show her breasts to get your attention.
A good opening line is ' hello, I'm Dave I read your profile and I like your pictures. How was your day? Or, how was your weekend? Or, how was your holiday? Or, how do you like living in Long Beach? These are very good opening lines. When she answers you back, then you say funny things that are not offensive and never get sexual EVER because you will just turn her off. Ask her what she likes to do for fun or what her favorite food is etc. Trust me, you will get her attention because you are all about her. Us ladies are turned on by a guy who is genuinely interested in what we like and our interests. Don't go to the sexual conversation, just don't go there. If you date and like each other, things will flow naturally and we as women won't feel threatened. Remember, us ladies are delicate flowers who deserve to be treated like the ladies we are.
Super Important.. Don't ask her a million personal questions in the beginning like:
1. How many times have you been married?
2. What was the cause of your divorce?
3. Do you and your X still talk?
4. Why are you still single?
5. Have you had any luck on this site? Duh, if I had any luck why would I still be on here?
6. Any personal questions about your kids.
7. When was your last relationship?
A lady will write on her profile only things that they really want you to know at first. After all, you are a total stranger and anything she won't disclose at first is none of your business unless you get serious.
Of course there are those women who will settle for the dirtbags and they are just desperate and if they will put up with your disrespect, they will put up and put out for any guy that shows them attention period. They have issues that not even you can fix.
What I've learned is, you get what you give. You treat a lady with respect, she will treat you with respect and there's no better way to start a relationship.
Guys, a few tips:
1. Be respectful of her time. She most likely works and needs her rest so if she declines a date during the week, don't take it personal. Myself being a career woman, I highly respect a guy who respects that my time is valuable.
2. Always pay for the dates. Pay for the valet and never ask to go Dutch. If you can't afford it, then refer back to Masterdate by George Reagan. You're not ready to date. Or, maybe you can afford it but your too cheap. Not a good sign and a real turn off.
3. Don't pressure her to have sex. Trust me, when she's ready, she'll let you know, you won't have to guess.
4. Always drive to her in the beginning. This is just courteous and the right thing to do. After you're dating awhile, she will want to come to you and you won't even have to ask. (Thumbs up)
5. If you're dating starts to get serious, take your profile down and let her know you did so. If she's into you the same way, she will take hers down too. If she doesn't, give it a couple more dates and if she still doesn't, end it because she's looking for the BBD (bigger, better deal).
So I have given you some great pointers guys, now I hope you will follow my tips and be a much better online dater. Don't be a player and treat the ladies with respect. This will get you much further in your quest for love.
Any questions or comments, contact me at Linda@Lindasdatelist.com
Xoxo, Linda