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Linda

Linda

Hello I am a blogger and and an author. I speak from my experiences only as I am not a doctor. I do consider myself an expert when it comes to relationship advice only because of what I have been through in my life experiences with Men and Dating and Marriages.
I hope you enjoy my blogs and more than that I hope they can help you or someone else!
xoxo, Linda

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Hello Readers, Linda here. Today I feel compelled to write about Usernames on Online Dating Sites. One can tell a lot about a person by their Username. For example, I had a guy message me the other night with the Username “LickMyBalls8888”? Seriously? I didn’t answer him back until he kept persisting. BTW, this was on Plenty of Fish. I read his bio and it said he was on the site to F&*K all of his wife’s friends. What a total idiot. I finally blocked him but honestly, what is he doing on POF? If he wants and is looking for just sex and is MARRIED, then first off, he shouldn’t be on a site if he is married and secondly go to a site that caters to the creep that he is.
I got another message from a guy “Will_N_Dowd”... WTF? Then he has the nerve to tell me that I should take one of my pictures down. This made me mad so I tried to message him back and I got a pop-up stating he only accepts messages from certain users. Again, this was on POF. I am not sure what the message meant but what a coward to send a rude message and then not give me the opportunity to message him back?
There are many more usernames that are inappropriate and I don’t think POF or any other site should allow it but then again, it’s probably a good thing because any decent person can look at a Username like the above and know to stay away.
I would love to hear your feedback on this!
Xoxo, Linda

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IWillBeSingleUntilTheDay


I will be single until the day I meet the man who will take himself off all dating sites and add me as a Facebook friend. He will introduce me as his GF and take me to meet his family. He will make me his priority while still maintaining his true self. He will want me to be with him all the time but he will respect my need for my own space when needed.
He will tell all of his X-girlfriends that he has met the love of his life and is no longer on the market, he will do this without me having to ask him to. He will want to cook with me and for me. He will go to parties with me and act like a gentleman. He will love and value my kids because he understands they are my heart. He will never criticize my flaws or imperfections. He will think I look prettier without make up. He will share the remote control and watch my favorite reality shows with me.
He will happily take me out and be proud to be with me. He will provide for and protect me. He will support me and my decisions and not deny me of my dreams. He will take the trash out and help around the house. He will keep his phone on and not hide it because he has nothing to hide.
He will become my best friend and lover. He will listen to me even if I am not making any sense. He will take care of me if I am sick. He will wash and maintain my car so I don’t have to anymore. He will not be a drunk or have any addictions. He will always put himself in my shoes because he is smart enough to understand women are complicated.
He won’t yell or raise his voice unless his is trying to protect me.
He will love me and want to be with me forever.
Xoxo, Linda

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Hello Readers, Linda here. Today I want to tell you about a Plenty of Fish Dating Story. I met him on POF. He was handsome, successful, funny and polite. He didn't ask for extra pictures or anything weird before we met. We talked on the phone a couple times before meeting. We met at a restaurant/bar and he looked just like his pictures and was dressed real nice which I appreciated. We had a cocktail and then we went to Sushi. It was a nice evening and he even paid my valet parking. The next day he wants to take me to dinner again so I say yes. He says he wants to drive and pick me up so I say ok. MISTAKE! Ladies, even on the second date don't let the guy come to your place you really don't know him yet.
Anyway, he picks me up and has a bottle of Saki in his hand so I think well, ok we pour a couple glasses before we walk to dinner from my house. He takes me to my favorite restaurant. Our table isn't ready so we go to the bar where he orders some more drinks and starts to get drunk. Then he starts to get "feely touchy", starts grinding against me with his "junk". I am so embarrassed I could scream! They call us to our table. He orders another drink and the entire night he never listened to anything I said. He just sat there and stared at me like I was dessert! Finally dinner was over and I'm thinking thank you god now I can get rid of him. He proceeds to tell me while we are walking back to my place that he is going to sleep on my couch! Wtf? I just laughed it off and he told me he was serious? No way! I told him no way in hell is this going to happen and he tells me well I can't drive I had too much to drink. Not my problem dude, you are a grown man, take a cab! Honestly, I told him goodbye at the door and sent him off. I assume he made it home because he tried to call me several times after but no way am I going out with him again. He obviously has a drinking problem and a stupid man problem because you don't assume you're going to spend the night on your dates couch on a second date.
This is why you "date" someone. It takes several dates before you know the person.
Lessons learned:
1. Don't let the guy know where you live or pick you up until you know he is a good person and you can trust him.
2. Don't ever let a guy sleep on your couch because he drank too much. He is a total stranger just because you went on a date doesn't mean you let him into your home right away!
3. Don't go out with a guy/girl who drinks like a fish and disrespects you.
4. What you see is what you get, if they get drunk on the date probably means they get drunk a lot. You don't need someone with an addiction problem nothing good can come from that.
Xoxo, Linda

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Hello Readers, Linda here. Today I want to talk about that annoying question I get asked a lot. "You're still single?". I am not sure why this annoys me but it does. I'm on a dating site and some of the guys on there that I have either dated or talked to will message me and ask me that. Isn't that a stupid question I mean if I wasn't single I wouldn't be on the dating site. I suppose they maybe can't believe I'm still single but at this point in my life I am just not ready to share my space with anyone and I haven't met anyone yet that I'm willing to do that with so here I am waiting patiently.
I have never been that type of woman who has to have someone all the time. I enjoy living alone and doing my own thing I only hope my marriage didn't mess me up to where I am afraid to take that leap again. I will admit it did take me years to get over my X and what I went thought with him. Maybe I'm not over it yet not sure but it's going to have to be one fantastic Man that will sweep me off my feet or I may be alone forever. I'm ok with that scenario, I'm an independent woman and I don't need a man to "complete me". Time will tell, I'm still dating so you never know!
Xoxo, Linda

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Hello Readers, Linda here. Today I want to tell you about a Plenty of Fish Dating Story. The reason I thought about this is because this Man contacted me again last night. It’s been awhile now, over a year. He messaged me on POF. No picture, but a message saying “I am a famous College Baseball Coach” and if I give you my name you can “Google” me. So, out of curiosity I googled him and sure enough he came up right away. Good looking Italian man. Seemed nice enough and I do have a weakness for athletes. .
We decided to meet after speaking on the phone several times. I am not even sure but it must not be Baseball season right now that’s why he’s back on POF. Anyway, I decide to meet him at the “Border Grill” in Santa Monica, Ca. I get there and he looks just like his picture but maybe a little heavier. That’s ok with me he’s a big guy. He has a table waiting so we go and sit down. He already had a cocktail on the table now this is a LUNCH date, not that it is a bad thing to have a cocktail at lunch but he kept on ordering them. This guy got so DRUNK and then he started telling all of the people around us that I was going to be his next wife! I was so embarrassed I could have just died.
He proceeds to write down his real estate agents name and phone number and “budget” because he wants to buy us a home in my neighborhood because he loves it there. Then he starts to tell me what he wants in the home, 4 bedrooms, an office, a pool etc. Seriously? Do you know how many women would go for that? This was our first date!
Ladies, beware of men like this. If they are famous coaches or athletes or anything else if they drink like a fish on the first date and act like an idiot stay away! Get out as fast as you can.
Footnote:
My BFF googled his name as well and found he had an outstanding restraining order against him by his ex-wife for domestic violence. Thank you God for BFF’s! That one slipped by me. He contacted me last night on POF and wanted me to call him. Of course I didn’t do it and I won’t Money cannot buy happiness I would rather be alone than be with someone like that.
Xoxo, Linda

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Hello Readers, Linda here. Today I want to talk about when you are a having a guy over for dinner. First off, don't go to the grocery store after working all day in a hurry trying to gather all the items to cook for him. Remember, you have worked all day and do not need to stress out about cooking dinner for a newly acquired bachelor. This is what a girlfriend of mine did after I explained to her how to put a pot roast in the crock pot with all the veggies and wallah dinner grandma style. Well she wasn't having any of it she follows the "Why Men Love Bitches" book pretty well. So, instead 15 minutes before she gets off work she calls Claim Jumper and orders a "gluten free rib dinner" off of the menu because the guy is on that meal plan, after all we can try to accommodate their needs right? She stops by Claim Jumper, picks it up, drives home and finds a nice (hardly used) roasting pan and some silverware and plates. She puts the ribs and fixings in the roasting pan in the oven and sets the table quickly with the silverware and paper towels for napkins.
He comes over, and she is in the kitchen with her apron on and pot holders in hand and hugs him and pulls the roasting pan out of the oven.. Shish-boom-bah dinner done. He is so impressed thinking she had time to cook all that and work all day...
That is how the dream girl handles dinner! The all too present "Nice Girl" will get the crock pot out and serve grandma style. Ladies, this is reserved for when you are officially seeing each other and he has earned it.
Don't kill yourself trying to impress a guy, they don't appreciate it. As long as their stomach is full who cares where the food came from?
Xoxo, Linda

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Hello Readers, Linda here. Just wanted to write to let you know I am not a doctor. I do not have any degrees. I do not have any certificates in Psychology, Psychotherapy, MFCC or anything related. I do however have a lot of experience to offer you and a lot of advice. Whether you listen or not that's up to you. I have been around the block a few times and I got burned real bad this last time. I also have a lot of great male and female friends that offer great advice as well. Honestly, I don't know what I would do without them in my life.
My goal with my Online Dating Blogs is to take my experiences and share them with others so that in some way, any way I can help someone else avoid what I went through.
I am currently on the market and dating online. I have a lot of stories to tell and everything I write is the truth. No need to sugarcoat anything here you can't make this stuff up.
I would love to hear your dating stories if you are willing to share!
Xoxo! Linda

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Hello Readers, Linda here. I want to write to you today about my X. I am sitting here reading all the blogs I write about him and I had a blonde moment! Why don't I write about something good that happened when we were together? So, I sit here with my trusty iPad thinking and thinking and then I start thinking "what should I have for dinner and I really need to get my nails done and I think I'll go to the gym later and then oh yeah, I'm supposed to be thinking of something good to write about my X...hmmmm. I think I'll have BBQ chicken and stir fry veggies and I'll get my nails done Friday and yes, I'll go to the gym later.
Have a nice day!
Xoxo, Linda

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Hello Readers, Linda here. Today I want to talk about what the guys tell me on the phone, online, or in person on dates in the Online Dating Arena about the "women". First off, let me tell you I started getting annoyed when these guys were always requesting more pictures? I already post the maximum allowed. Another thing, they request is a full length picture so they can see your whole body. Another annoying request is when they ask you to text them a picture "right now as you are". Seriously this was really getting to me until I started listening to their stories. Horror Stories. They speak of meeting women who post beautiful pictures and sound really cool on the phone which I am sure they are super cool people however; when they meet in person, the poor guy doesn't even recognize the woman! C'mon ladies! This is really sad and makes it really hard for women like me because we don't want to have to send extra pictures but you can hardly blame the guys right?
Ladies, please be secure with yourselves. Whatever you look like, you are enough! You are beautiful! You have to believe in yourself or nobody else will and when you meet the guy in person why embarrass yourself like that?? Why would you do that? If you are overweight so what? There are many men out there who don't care trust me. You want a person similar to yourself not someone total opposite lets get honest here!
Please post RECENT photos! I can't stress this enough, you're not fooling anyone at all you're just pissing the guys off and wasting their time and yours. Life is too short.
Xoxo, Linda

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Hello Readers, Linda here. Today I want to talk about what NOT to do on a first phone call or first date. The most important thing is when asked about your past relationship or marriage is not to tell them anything more than " we wanted different things". I find this to be the most effective. If the date wants further detail you can mention a few minor things like mine would be " he didn't want to ever go out" and I wanted more of a social life. There is no need to give them all your dirty laundry on the first few dates. What if you did and then you never see them again? It's really none of their business remember this is a total stranger and you just don't give your life story to a total stranger. Then on the other hand, if they start to tell you theirs, you can politely look at your watch and change the subject. The first date or first few dates are about having fun and getting to know each other that doesn't mean you reveal your life story.
Keep it simple and fun. The reason you date someone is to see if they are a good person or not. Trust me, after a few dates you will know it. They will show their true colors soon enough so better to maintain your privacy until trust is earned.

Xoxo, Linda

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