Hello Readers, Linda here. I was at the salon yesterday and talking with some ladies. A couple of the ladies were dating guys who came on strong at first and then just pulled away suddenly.... Both of the ladies had similar situations with the same outcome. We as women do not understand why this happens? Is it because perhaps we have sex with them too soon? Could it be they are secretly married or have girlfriends? Is it because they feel like they are getting too attached and get scared?
What is the girl to do when he stops texting and calling? Does she text him and call him out on it? Does she remain silent and just wait for him to come around? Does she try and forget him and start dating other guys?
Remember ladies, men are natural born HUNTERS. You have to let them come to you. If you chase them. text tem constantly or call them all the time they will run faster than a 300 horse power turbo Porsche. Don't chase a guy but you must let him know you are interested.
I am not ashamed to admit this has happened to me before and it's very puzzling. I didn't understand it until I read the book "He's Just Not That Into You". It's a great book and explains a lot about why men pull away. It's pretty simple, they are just not that into you! If they were into you they would want to spend all their free time with you and you wouldn't have to sit and ponder why you haven't heard from them. There would be no question in your mind whether they want you or not. If you met them online, they would insist you take your profile down and they would do the same. They would not want you to date anyone else!
So what's the big question or answer here? The truth is not everyone you meet that you fall for is going to feel the same way about you. Sure, they might keep you around for sex but they just aren't serious about you and they will continue to pursue other women until they find their dream girl.
It's up to you if you want to be "that girl" who sits around and waits for a guy that's just not into you. I won't be that girl and neither should you.
Another point I want to make is if you sleep with a guy too soon you run the risk of being hurt. Sex to guys is just sex unless you are his dream girl then it's a different story altogether. Women on the other hand tend to get emotional after having sex and to most guys like I said unless you are his dream girl, it's just sex, plain and simple. So the question is how do you avoid being "that girl"?
Here is my advice to any girl that is dating no matter where you met him. Don't have sex without monogamy! You should make the guy "court you" the old fashioned way. If you have sex with the guy without monogamy, he will wonder if you have sex with every guy you meet and the guy wants the girl who plays hard to get and has respect for herself and won't give it all up front. I believe once you give in and give them the whole candy store in the beginning, they lose interest fast.
After the girl talk at the salon I asked a male friend of mine why guys do that and he told me without even taking a breath "because they are chasing someone else"! Wow!
3 books I want to recommend to every single girl.
1) " The Top 10 Things Peopke Lie About on Online Dating Sites and Why, What Every Online Dater Needs to Know" by yours truly. Linda Jenkins
2) "Why Men Love Bitches" by Sherry Argov
3) "He's Just Not That Into You"! ( not sure the author)
All 3 of these books are available on Amazon.com.
Ladies, don't sit around and wait for a guy if he's not treating you like his dream girl. If he's not showing you respect and love, move on. Remember, not every guy you fall for is the right guy for you. Don't waste your time on a guy who uses you for sex or his "plan B" girl. You deserve better and if you show him you respect yourself then he will respect you too.
I would love to hear your feedback about this topic!
Contact me at Linda@Lindasdatelist.com